Gun Fight At The Not OK Corral

I have not written for two days because my feelings were so hurt by Anonymous that I have been crying in the corner and cutting myself with razor blades while I turn the lamp on and off for hours at a time. But I am back because I saw something that scared the hell out me. Apparently, gun laws are changing in many states that make it legal to carry a licensed and concealed weapon into bars and restaurants. Now I'm from Texas where guns are pretty much a regular thing. They're everywhere there. I remember on the first day of deer season some kids would skip class to go hunting with their dads. At birthday parties, you didn't hit the piñata with an old broom handle. You shot at that bitch with a sawed off shotgun and when it finally burst open, bullets and ammunition fell out of it with a couple of Pixy Stix and a Bazooka Bubblegum thrown in for good measure. Personally, I was never one for guns. I recall getting a BB gun when I was about ten years old. I shot a bird once and when it fell out of the tree and died in front of me I went crying into the house. My Grandma comforted me and my Grandpa rolled his eyes at what a disappointment I was to him. But I dunno how I feel about them being in a restaurant or bar where every Tom, Dick and Dirty Harry can feel free to shoot up the place the second his burger comes out overcooked.

Tennessee is one of four states, along with Arizona, Georgia and Virginia, that recently enacted laws explicitly allowing loaded guns in bars while eighteen other states allow weapons in restaurants that serve alcohol. Scary. Now I guess it all depends on if the servers are allowed to carry guns too. I suppose they will have a legal right to, but maybe the restaurant itself would disallow their employees the option. You know, in the hand book it would say shit like "your hair can't touch the collar of your shirt" and "you are not allowed to chew gum while on the floor" and "if a customer shoves a gun in your face because you forgot to put a lime in their Diet Coke instead of a lemon, you are shit out luck because your weapon must remain in your locker along with your cell phone and iPod." Bummer. I understand that people want guns for their own safety. After the recent shooting at The University of Texas, I hear that Governor Rick Perry wants to make guns legal on campuses. He says that if other people would have had guns then they could have stopped the gunman. Really? That makes no sense to me. It would be like the Old West with everyone trying to be the hero but shooting more people in the process.

Now there is no easy answer to this and I do not want to get all political and shit. I just don't like the idea of some drunk ass kicker who has a gun his pocket being able to have four Jack and Cokes and then getting mad when some other asswipe insults him. And I know the law says that if you have a gun on you, then you aren't supposed to be drinking alcohol. And I am just sure that people will follow that law. Just like they do with all the other things that are not supposed to happen when drinking alcohol: driving, going to work, drunk texting. It seems like a recipe for disaster. But that's just me.


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